Senyum :-)

assalamualaikum

salam rabu

good morning semua

walau mcm mana, sedih, tak suka, marah, benci

cuba senyum...sabar..ingat Allah

istifar banyak2...

jangan dengar hasutan syaitan
emmm...

that what I trying to do

everytime....

sedih, sayu, rindu...

menangis...tak kira masa or tempat

tau jer la...emosi tak berapa stabil sangat

jiwa a bit kacau

but...Mummy Ayu akan cuba senyum

cepat2 istifar

its really help.. in sya Allah

nampak luaran...I look okay

but....dalam hati, dalam fikiran..hanya Allah yg tahu

hanya yg melalui jer..dapat memahami

Mummy Ayu nampak kuat

and..ada kawan2 kata.. you kuat

no.. I am not

kita hambaNya yg lemah

ada masa...Mummy Ayu akan menangis tiba2 jer

rasa rindu sangat2..tiba2 je

and..sometimes rasa

betul ke...Didi dah takde

 sbb kami memang dah terbiasa jauh

hanya hp mendekatkan kami

whatsapp selalu, videocall...voicecall everyday

but whatsapp la..memang selalu

ada benda sikit pun... a small little thing..kita akan whatsapp

that was the thing ..  I really missed.

even..masa mula2 tu..bunyi whatsapp masuk.. I was thinking its from him

kat rumah, kat office..kat mana2 la..

tetiba jer..kalau teringat tu

Allahuakbar

sayu sangat

but..cepat2 istifar

cuba utk kuatkan semangat

and....redha ketentuan Ilahi

and..Mummy Ayu selalu fikir

Mummy Ayu sedih...rasa mcm down..

hilang suami..tempat bergantung..my partner of life

ada orang lain..lagi sedih

but me...

alhamdulillah

Mummy Ayu kerja, ada 2 orang ..boy & girl, 

and cara dia pergi...walaupun mengejut..so sudden

tapi Mummy Ayu ada disebelah dia... and kami dah spent masa bersama 

walaupun tak puas

but yet..kalau Mummy Ayu keja...kat Bangkok

takde sapa sebelah dia

mcm mana Mummy Ayu nak balik..nak kejar flight... Allahuakbar.. lagi lah kan

tak mau dibayangkan

so..it was well planned by Allah

Dia jarakkan kami

Mummy Ayu dah terbiasa bertiga jer ngan anak2

dah terbiasa handle diaorang .. sorang2

and dah terbiasa jauh ngan Didi

cuma kali ni..betul2 jauh

and..

never can see him again

never can text him again

never can comeback to him again

never can hug him, kiss him, 

never can hear his voice again

never can take pic with him again

never 

:-(

but yet...

I try to smile..

as much I can

try to be strong

with support from all my families & friends

in sya Allah

Mummy Ayu boleh

:-)

#Al Fatihah buat kesayanganku

p/s ~ bunga tu bukan Mummy Ayu dapat tau..nak kasi kat Datin

cantik kan? bunga kat sini cantik2 & murah

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About mummy_ayu

I am Mummy Ayu And obviously I am a mummy of two kids, Ian and Iris. This blog is like my diary. Its contain my life story, my kids, my passions,my hobbies, my friends, my cooks and many more.